A big shift

As I've previously shared, since The Socialist came out, I've dealt with some symptoms of PTSD and sleep disorders. Therapy is great, but it doesn't 'fix' anything. If only I could take the edge off, you know? Something to pull me from despair into just sadness. Well, we've got it!

 

 

About 6 months ago I had a genetic screening done to see, based on my genotype, which medications would likely yield the best results with the fewest side effects. Essentially the top 100 drugs are grouped into:

 

Green: high likelihood of desired effects with minimal side effects

Yellow: high likelihood of desired effects with some side effects

Red: moderate likelihood of desired effects with a high likelihood of side effects

DO NOT: self-explanatory


5 months ago I received the report. my green list was pretty big. Yellow had several. Red & black, combined, had about 20. Not bad.

4 months ago I finished my research and consultation with my Dr. and decided on a popular SNRI to start with.

3 months ago magic happened:

• My relationship with little Smye blossomed - from something I thought was pretty great to absolutely heavenly.
• My depression lightened - it's still there, but it's no longer black, just slightly grey.
• My anxiety shifted. I'm still anxious, but when something bad happens, I am anxious and that's it. I no longer spin-up to the point of having made the 27 logical steps to how this will lead me to being dead in a ditch within a year.
• My tremor disappeared.
• My sleep improved - I actually haven't sleepwalked since the day I started.
• My nightmares went from every night to only once a month.
• My dreams are often good.

There's a lot of stigma around mental health and medication, so I've thought long and hard about whether and how to write this. But at the end of the day - yes, medication is a crutch. Just as a crutch is a crutch for a broken leg - your leg is still broken and a crutch helps you heal. Here my neurobiology is changes from a childhood of abuse and then a traumatic event, of course I need some aid. So I will just put it out there.

And at this point comes the PSA: Get therapy. Yes, you. The healthy, super awesome, no problems, sunshine and daisies reader out there. Do it. Here's why:
Mental health and somatic health are incredibly blurred: in short - mental health parity exists for a reason. We get an annual physical, why not an annual mental health screening? You're healthy? Great! Stay healthy. Let's catch any potential yellow flags while they're still yellow rather than waiting until they've become red flags.

Don't do this...